Sandra Coyner, Inspired by Earth
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Let Go or Don't Grasp in the First Place?

5/26/2015

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Many of my yoga themes have dealt with the idea of letting go and many will continue along those lines because we are born to a society of attachments. But, I found this most amazing quote which redirects us and points out why we shouldn't have to let go in the first place...

"We need to live being aware of the ever-changing nature of reality and appreciate the present moment. It’s not about letting go, it’s really about not grasping in the first place." Matt Valentine

My daughter just graduated from high school. People ask me how I feel; they ask me if I am sad.  I know a lot of friends who have posted on FB that they are sad or that they have cried, but I do not feel that way at all... I am excited! I am anticipatory of what comes next...what comes next??!  I am looking forward to seeing her path extend before her.  Alluding to Valentine's quote, I do not have to let go of her high school experience, because I had never latched onto it in the first place.  Things change.  That is the only thing you can be certain of; that everything as you know it in this moment will change in the next.  One moment my greyhound is sleeping, the next he is a bundle of puppy energy nibbling at me to play. 

"From the Introduction to Crooked Cucumber, a biography of Zen Buddhist teacher Shunryu Suzuki by David Chadwick:

One night in February of 1968, I sat among fifty black-robed fellow students, mostly young Americans, at Zen Mountain Center, Tassajara Springs, ten miles inland from Big Sur, California, deep in the mountain wilderness. The kerosene lamplight illuminated our breath in the winter air of the unheated room.

Before us the founder of the first Zen Buddhist monastery in the Western Hemisphere, Shunryu Suzuki-roshi, had concluded a lecture from his seat on the altar platform. "Thank you very much," he said softly, with a genuine feeling of gratitude. He took a sip of water, cleared his throat, and looked around at his students. "Is there some question?" he asked, just loud enough to be heard above the sound of the creek gushing by in the darkness outside.

I bowed, hands together, and caught his eye.

"Hai?" he said, meaning yes.

"Suzuki-roshi, I've been listening to your lectures for years," I said, "and I really love them, and they're very inspiring, and I know that what you're talking about is actually very clear and simple. But I must admit I just don't understand. I love it, but I feel like I could listen to you for a thousand years and still not get it. Could you just please put it in a nutshell? Can you reduce Buddhism to one phrase?"

Everyone laughed. He laughed. What a ludicrous question. I don't think any of us expected him to answer it. He was not a man you could pin down, and he didn't like to give his students something definite to cling to. He had often said not to have "some idea" of what Buddhism was.

But Suzuki did answer. He looked at me and said, "Everything changes." Then he asked for another question."
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Appreciating Life

5/19/2015

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Today's theme was about appreciation and gratitude.  The following two Zen stories are from class:

"There was a group of elderly gentlemen in Japan who would meet to exchange news and drink tea. One of their diversions was to search for costly varieties of tea and create new blends that would delight the palate. When it was the turn of the oldest member of the group to entertain the others, he served tea with the greatest ceremony, measuring out the leaves from a golden container. Everyone had the highest praise for the tea and demanded to know by what particular combination he had arrived at this exquisite blend. The old man smiled and said, “Gentlemen, the tea that you find so delightful is the one that is drunk by the peasants on my farm. The finest things in life are neither costly nor hard to find.”



"Traveler: “What kind of weather are we going to have today?”
Shepherd: “The kind of weather I like.”
Traveler: “How do you know it will be the kind of weather you like?”
Shepherd: “Having found out, sir, that I cannot always get what I like, I have learned to always like what I get. So I am quite sure we will have the kind of weather I like.”


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If You Had to Name Your Cows...

5/13/2015

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There is a story that Thich Nhat Hanh tells  about, well, cows.  One day Buddha is sitting in the woods with several monks when a farmer comes rushing by asking if they had seen his cows.  Buddha inquires and the farmer replies that he owns four cows, all of which have gotten loose and his crops have been ruined by insects; all is not well.  Buddha replies that he and the monks have been sitting there for quite some time and no cows have gone by. He suggests that the farmer head off in the opposite direction.  As the farmer takes off in the other direction, Buddha says to the monks, aren't you glad you don't have any cows to lose?

The cows, in this story, represent our attachments but not just to things.  They also represent our habits we do not let go of.  Think of the items and habits you are attached to.  Then, get out a piece of paper and write at the top "Names of my Cows".  Then start writing. Your cow names may be Worry, Smoking, Fancy Jewelry, Fear, Pride, Shoes.  My head cow is named Worry and she usually gives birth to a calf named Nail Biter.  These are my attachments I can choose to reside with or choose to let go of.

There is a Yiddish saying that reads, "Whoever needs milk, bows to the animal."

Do you want to bow down to the words you wrote on your list? Do you want to surrender to Worry? Do you want to succumb to financial instability because you are attached to the cows "Fancy Jewelry" and "Shoes"?  Do you want to be right all the time versus happy because you are so attached to the cow called Pride?

These unnecessary burdens become heavier and heavier by the day.

"He who lets the goat be laid on his shoulders is soon after forced to carry the cow. "Italian Proverb

Actor Russell Crowe said, "There's nothing like sitting back and talking to your cows." I am guessing he truly meant that literally.  But in the context of this theme, talking to your cows uses up your time and energy.  My mind and heart know how foolish it is to sit around chatting with Worry. Worry is an amazing storyteller and she has this way, while chewing her cud, of roping in and carrying me off on a story that has many incredulous endings. And when Worry has my attention, I sit and listen to every single one of her outlandish endings! 

It is time to separate from the cows.  It is time to put forth and be the best we can be without dragging cows behind us.  There is another story where Buddha is sitting in a cave and his attendant is out in front when Mara comes along. Mara is a demon who represents all of the bad habits and delusions we are distracted by. Mara is the one who tried to bring Buddha out of meditation as he sat under the Boddhi tree so he would not reach enlightenment. Buddha's attendant was very upset to see Mara approaching. At first, when Mara asked to speak with Buddha, the attendant did not want to loet him in but Buddha invited Mara in wholeheartedly as he were a long lost friend. Mara explained how tired he was of doing his job. It was becoming more and more difficult because people were turning to meditation and it was getting harder to distract them. Buddha replied his job wasn't easy either.  People were quoting him to have said things he never said and telling stories of things he had never done. He asked Mara if he would like to switch places. The attendant was relieved to hear Mara say no. And Buddha advised that he keep doing his job to the best of his ability and so would he, Buddha. 

The question is are you doing your job and being your Divine Self to the best of your ability if you are juggling the weight of the cows you wrote down...

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Mother's Day Story

5/10/2015

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"One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife’s car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog.

Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall .. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing.

In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.

He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she may be ill, or that something serious had happened.

He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls.

As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, What happened here today?

She again smiled and answered, You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world did I do today?
Yes was his incredulous reply.
She answered, Well, today I didn’t do it.

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  • Home
    • About Me
    • Contact Me
  • Yoga & Reiki
    • Yoga
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  • My Book & Reiki Online
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  • End-of-Life Doula