The "Right" Triangle
I was helping son out with his honors geometry again. One of the questions gave the base lengths of an isosceles trapezoid and its altitude and you had to determine the length of the sides. If you drew the altitude down from the middle of the top base to the bottom it resulted in looking at a trapezoid split into two equal halves. It looked balanced but did not offer a clear view of the answer. But, if you drew the line down from a corner of the top base it created a right triangle and that is where the right answer began to form.
Coincidentally (and speaking of right triangles), a friend posted a triangle on facebook yesterday called the Drama Triangle. The three points were labeled with the one of three categories everyone falls into when in drama mode: rescuer, persecutor and victim. I clicked on the tab to read more because it was written by Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat Pray Love, which is a book I really loved. I was immediately fascinated, completely knew which one I was and immediately saw an answer to some things in my life I had been pondering. Even better, Gilbert redirected readers to a website of a man who created a new triangle, I'm calling it the right triangle (for the sake of this theme!) with the anecdotes to each drama mode.
This is going to be a brief synopsis because I would rather you go directly to the following website and read the specifics there where they were created. http://powerofted.com/
The history of the drama triangle is this: Dr. Karpman created the triangle to explain how people fall into victim, persecutor and rescuer to manage their fears (have "control" over the things they do not want in their lives).
David Emerald, in turn, created a triangle showing the opposite of those three drama characteristics and, hence, a way out of them.
He explained victims "feel powerless and at the mercy of life’s events and may avoid taking responsibility for their actions, finding it easier to blame others or their circumstances." That, instead, the victim should, instead, look at himself as a creator. One who can "Choose one’s response to life circumstances – even when problems arise."
"Persecutors usually have an underlying fear of their own victimization and, therefore, adopt various methods to control, protect and defend themselves in order to avoid becoming a Victim. They must win and convince others that they are right." The opposite of persecutor is challenger. The "Challenger serves as a catalyst for change, learning and growth, and creates an opportunity for thoughtful action for a Creator... A Challenger approaches life and relationships with a learning intent and “builds up” rather than “puts down.”
"Rescuers look for Victims to save and often are quick to jump-in and save the day, even when others are responsible...They often take on more work or duties, even when others are responsible or could do it themselves." And the remedy for a rescuer is to become a coach. "A Coach sees each person as a Creator in their own right, and seeks to support them in the process of creating outcomes."
Go to the website http://powerofted.com/ to read more and then come back to honestly answer, which one are you?
I found this triangle idea immensely inspiring and perspective changing. Maybe the moral of this theme is this; every time you think 'why did I learn this in school, I will never use it again', it is a reminder for you to bring your attention back to this story about the right triangle.
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